People’s reactions and behaviour have intrigued me since I was a child.  My logical, analytical brain likes to make sense of things, understanding the thinking and motivation behind the action.  This led to an interest in psychology, a career in Human Resources and is what makes the work I do now, as a Coach, endlessly fascinating. 

When people’s responses are at odds with my own thoughts and view of the world, I get curious.

To me, wearing a mask in public places, where other people might be exposed to a potentially deadly virus, which I could be carrying unknowingly, makes perfect sense.  The last thing I would want to do is cause suffering to others. 

For some people, having to wear a mask is an outrage, an infringement of their freedom.  I have to admit to being rather surprised by some of the responses I saw on the television and the strength of feeling over something that, to me, seems relatively minor.  I learned long ago (during the 90’s, I think) that I could live my life with greater ease, if I didn’t “sweat the small stuff”.  Being told I need to wear a face-mask in public is the small stuff to me.

Watching people being interviewed about their views on the subject, most seemed OK with it, however, the last person wasn’t happy with the idea at all and when asked why, simply said, “I don’t believe in coronavirus”.  I was disappointed that the interviewer didn’t continue the conversation with the young man, to find out more. 

What did he mean, “I don’t believe in coronavirus”?  Does he think it’s some great conspiracy theory and the virus doesn’t actually exist?  I have to say, if that turned out to be the case, I would be mightily impressed with whoever had managed to pull that one off – just think of all the people, globally, who would have to be involved in perpetuating that myth?

Maybe he was concerned about how he would look if he wore a mask?  Or how his mates would react?  Our need to be accepted and fit in with our peers is a powerful driver of our behaviour, especially when we are young.

Or perhaps he accepted there was a virus out there but didn’t think it was a big threat?  Well yes, taking what we know about the virus and the laws of probability, as a young fit man with no underlying health conditions, that may be true for him.  Yet, is this just about me?  Is my only concern about the impact of the virus on me and my loved ones? 

We may live on an island in the UK, but no man is an island.  The reality is, we are all inextricably linked and interdependent.  Even if you were to approach this from a self-centred perspective, where the focus is on me and what I want, you still can’t get away from this truth. 

We need and depend on other people, not just those nearest and dearest to us, who meet our social, emotional and other needs, but from a practical perspective we need others, far and wide and mostly unknown to us, for the food we eat, the items we possess, for our services, for pretty much everything that makes up our day-to-day existence. 

Ever stopped to think about it?  No?  Then give this exercise a try.  Pick up one thing that’s in front of you right now and think of all the people involved in producing that and getting it to you.  Maybe it has different components, each made by different people in a variety of locations, then there’s the people who put it together, those who run the systems that enabled you to order it, the people who created the packaging to put it in, the trees that went into the packaging, the people who felled the trees, the people who manufactured the packaging and the transport and logistics people who brought it to your door.  The list goes on and on.

From time to time, I think it’s good to stop and appreciate the thousands of people out there, most of whom we’ll never meet, who contribute to the smooth functioning of our daily lives.  We’ve all become much more appreciative, of late, of the doctors and nurses who risk their own lives keeping us safe and well, plus the firefighters and policeman and all the people performing essential roles like the shelf-packers, the check-out staff and the refuse collectors, who rarely get our thanks and often hardly even a second glance.

I’m pleased to live in a free country.  Freedom is actually one of my key values and drives a lot of the choices I make about how to life my own life, so I totally get the desire and need to be free.  And yet, I also believe that with freedom comes responsibility.  My own view is that it’s not all about me and my freedom, what I want – there is the greater good to be considered here too and it’s important to balance my wants and needs versus the good of the whole. 

Yes, I’m free to make the choice about whether I wear a mask.  I can choose not to wear one and risk having to pay a fine (for every choice there is a consequence).  Or I can choose to wear it, maybe experiencing a bit of discomfort, having my glasses steam up, but so what?  It’s a minor inconvenience to me but I know it’s the right choice for the benefit of others.

I’m reminded of the words of Shantideva, the 8^th century Indian scholar, who said, “All joy in this world comes from wanting others to be happy and all suffering in this world comes from wanting only oneself to be happy”.  Ancient wisdom that’s true and whilst they didn’t have fMRI scanners in the 8^th century to prove it, modern psychological research and neuroscience has now proven that giving and showing kindness to others activates the reward centres of our brain, which produces dopamine and make us feel good.

I therefore encourage you to be joyful, live with ease and choose wisely.  Keep well everyone.